Ramble & Rove

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We'll call this post... Illusion Recipes

Written by Brenna

Maybe I’m just really tired and feeling silly or this is who I am now but roll with us here…

Let’s say maybe right now your life is in shambles or you feel like you’re running a marathon while on fire (cough cough brenna) but *knock *knock *knock here comes the holidays creeping up to BOP you on the head… Maybe you volunteered to bring a few sides to Thanksgiving or Christmas and all of the sudden you’re like, “hot damn, I’ve gotta make something that will make my family think otherwise about my position as captain of the hot mess express”. HAVE NO FEAR. Your favorite post grad losers have come through once again to help you out. We have rounded up a few recipes sure to make your family think your life isn’t in shambles. #roundofapplauseplease

If you didn’t already know, we don’t tell stories with our recipes. We hate scrolling through a zillion pictures of something from fifty different angles and the story of why this cake beats all the other cakes when it’s literally the same recipe… So like just trust us when we tell you that these recipes are worth your time, money and energy. We know a lot about energy and prefer things that take little of it up so…

Anyway, we are #thankfulgratefulblessed that you are here reading our recipes and hope that if you do make one of these you’ll let us know how it turns out.

Texas Sheet Cake…

Proof is in the name… Remember, everything is better in Texas or something.

FOR THE CAKE:

  • 2 cups Flour

  • 2 cups Sugar

  • 1/4 teaspoon Salt

  • 4 Tablespoons (heaping) Cocoa

  • 2 sticks Butter

  • 1 cup Boiling Water

  • 1/2 cup Buttermilk

  • 2 whole Beaten Eggs

  • 1 teaspoon Baking Soda

  • 1 teaspoon Vanilla

FOR FROSTING:

  • 1/2 cup Finely Chopped Pecans

  • 1-3/4 stick Butter

  • 4 Tablespoons (heaping) Cocoa

  • 6 Tablespoons Milk

  • 1 teaspoon Vanilla

  • 1 pound (minus 1/2 Cup) Powdered Sugar

Grab a 18x13 sheet pan, or something close in size because if I recall, not everyone is obsessed with baking like I am and might not have one. In a mixing bowl, combine flour, sugar and salt.

In a sauce pan, melt the butter, add cocoa and stir it together. Then add boiling water, allow the mixture to boil for 30 seconds before turning off the heat. Pour over the flour mixture and stir lightly to cool.

In a measuring cup, pour the buttermilk and add beaten eggs, baking soda and vanilla. Stir buttermilk mixture into butter/chocolate mixture. Pour into sheet cake pan and bake at 350-degrees for 20 minutes.

While the cake is baking, save time and make the icing. You can chop the pecans if you want to or leave them out because that way the cake will taste better in my opinion. (no nuts please). Melt the butter in a saucepan. Add cocoa, stir to combine, turn off the heat. Add the milk, vanilla and powdered sugar. Stir together and pour over the warm cake. NOTE: not fresh out of the oven warm but like oh I pulled it out about ten minutes ago warm… I swear this is the best dang cake ever and JT’s pop says its almost as good as Loretta’s chocolate cake which is saying something because he’s 82 and doesn’t lie.

Alright guys, it’s your girl Callie here and I’m about to lay down a super easy, really delicious deviled egg recipe. Except it’s not really a recipe with like actual measurements or anything because that’s not how I roll (and Jason will never make this because he needs exact measurements when cooking. It’s cute.)

Anyway, what you’re gonna want to do is get some water boiling on the stove. Then plop some eggs in there (I don’t know how many like at least 6 so that you’ll have 12 halves since that’s usually how many holes are in those egg plate things). Now I have no secrets to boiling eggs, you gotta Google that and take the average of what all the articles say. Maybe boil them for like 8-10 minutes? To the hard boil stage. I also have no tips on how to peel them, but always remember it’s not what the eggs look like, it’s how they taste, so if they’re a bit ugly from a botch peeling job, it will all be okay.

Separate the yellow part from the white and put all the yellow in a bowl. Then it’s time to add things. In order of most abundant ingredient first: may-o-naise a little mustard, less lemon juice, and the smallest hint of sugar. This is where you just put some of each thing in, taste it and then adjust as needed. And then you mix all that up, throw it back in the halved egg whites (if you’re feeling fancy you can pipe it in, like in an icing piping bag, to make it look pretty), and then sprinkle the top with paprika or Tony’s Chachere’s (Tony’s is best). And boom you’re done!

My (Kenzie’s) turn!
This is a classic and it’s super easy and super delicious and good for other dinners too, not just Thanksgiving. GREEN BEAN CASSEROLE!

  • 4 cans green beans, drained

  • 2 cans cream of chicken or cream of mushroom
    Salt and pepper to taste

Mix all that together and spread it in a casserole dish. Pop it in the oven at 350 for about 25 minutes until heated through. Top with those French fried onions (literally as many as you want) and heat for another five so they get all nice and crispy and delish.
Easy as heck and crowd-pleasing too.

Whatever you do, don’t stress too much about impressing people. Focus on enjoying delicious food and the company of your loved ones and everything you have to be thankful for! Have a safe and very happy Thanksgiving, y’all!